In the summer of 2013, the week that my husband announced to me that he’d like a divorce, I started going to church.
At the time, it was a place just to find a sense of peace within my life and within myself.
It was the one hour of my week where I could go and make sense of what was happening in my life.
After 4 months of attending church regularly, I inquired about getting baptized, as I’d never been baptized as a child.
That year, I worked closely with Reverend Andrew Federle. Meeting biweekly to work through my own issues and to learn what spirituality and religion meant to me, and what role they were meant to play in my life.
Rev. Andrew will never know just how much that year meant to me, and although I was still very much in the thick of grappling with my own self-worth at the time, he helped give me a sense of purpose, understanding, and meaning to my life when I found that I had none within myself.
Fast forward to June of 2014...
And I, at 31 years old, got baptized in front of the entire congregation at St. Clements church.
Instead of being excited, I remember I was so nervous that day. So nervous to show up as myself, an adult, to a ceremony that was otherwise regulated for children.
But, that year as I went through the process of learning about religion, and spirituality and truly what role they were to play in my life, I remember being so thankful that I had the opportunity to choose this for myself.
Growing up in a family that didn’t attend church, I now had the opportunity to choose what I wanted to for myself. I also had the opportunity to choose to be baptized.
I got to choose.
I had the choice.
And I believe that having that choice made all the difference for me.
Because I got to realize and acknowledge that apart from God (or whatever you like to call God - Universe, Divine Intelligence, etc.,) that this was a choice I got to make to connect to that inner part of myself where no one else had the authority or control to make that decision for me.
That year brought about so much change in my life, and to the direction, my life would take. And although I had never really aligned with a specific religion before (if I had to have picked, it would have probably been Buddhism) but choosing to be baptized in the Anglican tradition brought me to a sense a spirituality that I don’t think I would have come to on my own.
I don’t always go to church every Sunday, or even very regularly these days; God lives everywhere 😉 and doesn’t care where or if you go to a specific place to acknowledge your spiritually.
What matters is that you connect to whatever feels right for you.
And to do that consistently.
That is where you will find God.
That is where you will find God within yourself.
May Grace and Peace be with you always.
Happy Sunday All ❤️
xo Tanya 😘